Inbetween: Akin to the Platypus
by jashykins
Summary: Tobias Fangor, when he is acquiring a dolphin, is suddenly transported to a world where The Avengers are real. As he tries to find a way back home, he feels himself growing closer to Bruce Banner and starts to wonder if he should really focus on getting back.
1. Chapter 1

**About the Inbetween Series:**

I have some ideas for stories that I don't usually write because my three main series take up so much time (that and other blog work). So I decided that between writing sections of my main series, to write short little fanfics.

These fanfics will be HIGHLY self-indulgent. Because I work so hard on my other series that I deserve a little break.

Sometimes some of these "Inbetween Fics" might be samples of later works (that might turn out to be either a fanfic series OR original series).

**About "Akin to the Platypus":**  
I've been dying to do a proper fic for the Tobias/Bruce Banner pairing for some time now. Now, to those readers who have read some of my fics on my A03 account, I am in the process of writing a long fic with the pairing in it. But that fic doesn't focus on that one pairing specifically. As for the one shots I've done of the pairing, they have been full of adult material and haven't focused on the emotional side.

**Where It Takes Place in the Animorphs and The Avengers Timelines:**

This fic takes place during #15 The Escape in the Animorphs series. In The Avengers timeline, it's sometime after the Battle of New York when Bruce Banner has moved into the Avengers Tower.

* * *

I feel akin to the Platypus. An orphan in a family. A swimmer, a recluse. Part bird, part fish, part lizard.

Trevor Dunn

_Ah!_ I yelled out.

I had been happy to be able to join my friends on missions. More than happy, actually. The Ellimist had lied to me about what his reward was, but I was happy to be able to join my friends. Well, normally I was happy to finally join in death defying missions and not have to watch my girlfriend nearly die from afar. But right now I was not happy with the whole morphing business. Particularly the whole acquiring thing.

_Acquire it and it'll calm down!_ Rachel, my girlfriend, yelled at me.

_I'm doing that but it's not calming down!_ I yelled back at her.

Some animals didn't calm down when they were acquired for whatever reason. I might have to ask Ax about that later. When I wasn't being dragged around by a dolphin. Cute my ass. This one was a monster.

And things were going to get worse. I started to fight harder as the dolphin started to dive underwater.

_Ahhh!_ I yelled out and closed my eyes.

Suddenly I felt weird. I wasn't wet and it felt like I was-I opened my eyes and saw that I wasn't where I had been. The feeling of falling suddenly made sense as that's what was happening to me now.

I spread my wings before thinking anything else. I needed to get control before anything else happened. Once I had steadied myself, I started to look around. I looked around first for any predators that would be out to get me.

When I saw that everything around me was safe, I started trying to figure out what had happened. Why was I not stuck on a dolphin about to be drowned? Yeah, that wasn't the most pleasant of situations, but at least I would know what was going on then.

Was this a ploy of the Ellimist's? What did he want me to do? Even the last time he had contacted me, there had been a little more direction. Not a lot, but more than this.

I looked where I was flying and saw a city beneath me. What city? I took my time looking around so that I could enjoy the thermals. Even though I was confused and scared, flying could calm me on the worst of days.

Yes, trapping myself in morph had been incredibly stupid, but flying was sometimes worth it. I had grown used to what I was now and sometimes I even considered myself more hawk than boy. But now that I could morph I could take Rachel out on actual dates.

Looking below at city life, I saw a couple walking out of a coffee shop and smiling. Normal people or Controllers? Was one a Controller and only concerned about making the other a Controller too? Or were they normal and having a day full of normal couple things? Did neither of them have to worry about parasitic aliens from outer space?

I looked around the city and finally realized where I was: New York City.

Somehow I had been transported from the West Coast to the East Coast in a matter of seconds. Or something less than seconds. What was the Ellimist trying to show me here? Was it the Ellimist or some other force? How many god-like beings existed?

I decided to make a big circle around New York before resting. I needed to try and see why I was here before I did anything else. As I started the big circle I felt the hawk's need to hunt. I remembered my first time hunting and how it had scared me shitless, but I had come a long way since then.

I guess after I made the circle around New York that I would have to eat. No use resting if I would just have to eat soon afterwards. And I was nervous so hunting should calm me down now.

As I made my big circle around New York, something caught my eyes. It couldn't be. I had to be missing something. I started flying towards one building just to make sure that I was seeing correctly.

As I got closer, the realization of where I was started to hit me hard. I wasn't just on the East Coast. I was also in another dimension now. My blood started to turn cold as I thought about how useless continuing to flap my wings was.

In front of me was proof that I might not ever see Rachel again. In front of me was proof that my friends might die while I wasn't even close by.

I started to circle around Avengers Tower.


	2. Chapter 2

Part of me thought that just flying around would send me back and another part of me thought that it was better that I explore this Avengers Dimension. Spending a lot of time as a hawk didn't exactly give me time to binge watch on movies. However, Jake and I had watched some of the Avengers movies together. I think there was another term but I couldn't remember it at the moment.

How was I supposed to think up the slightest complex thought now?

Anyways, because of the movies I had learned the layout a little bit. Knowing who was where and Ax had helped figure out how everything functioned. Marco had helped my Shorm and I think it had to do with how much Ax annoyed us with his discoveries.

Marco was a loyal friend, but an asshole at times.

So when I had flown around I had tried to connect pictures and diagrams to what I saw below me. It helped that I was the scout of the Animorphs so I had a lot of experience just looking at stuff. And since this was the Avengers Dimension, there wouldn't be a stray Controller that would happen to look up at me.

Not that a planet that now knew aliens existed would brush off something strange. But a random bird flying around making people think something was up? Those people would probably still be the conspiracy theorists that no one took seriously. At least an organization like S.H.I.E.L.D. or Hydra wouldn't pay too much attention to them.

I was getting even more hungry and figured that after over an hour of flying around that I had scooped out the place as well as I could for now. Maybe something else would appear and I could find a way home, but for now I had to eat.

As I flew away from the city, acceptance of what had happened finally came to me. Or at least how much I could stand to accept at the moment. I wanted to see Rachel again but if I couldn't…I guess she would have to learn to carry on without me. I would have to learn to do the same without her.

And, hey, what if I joined the Avengers? What if I convinced them to let me join? I couldn't fight off the Yeerks anymore, but at least I could still be useful. Maybe getting myself something to do would make me feel better.

I wouldn't let this Earth fall under alien invasion. But would the Avengers even accept me or just laugh me off?

I sighed in relief when I left the city behind me. I didn't really like cities nowadays as they weren't good for hunting. Awesome for thermals and hangout spots, but they weren't any place I'd like to make my home in.

If I ever returned home, and if we ever won the war, maybe I could find a way to live in one if Rachel wanted to.

I had to remind myself to focus so that I could hunt correctly. I would get lost in the hunt and find a little bit of peace. I looked around for other predators who wouldn't like a random hawk hunting on their territory. I tried to think of what birds lived on the East Coast that didn't live on the West Coast. What birds would I have to be really worried about and which ones could I just brush off?

Besides the birds of prey, there were also birds like crows who never ceased to amaze me with how annoying they could be. Crows were like the Marcos of the bird world. There were also small birds that if you got too close to their nest they would attack you.

Rachel had found out the hard way that sometimes cute things that wouldn't harm you as a human could harm you in morph.

I looked down below and saw a decent sized rabbit, but as I prepared to dive down to get it, another bird swooped down for the prey. I didn't squawk after the bird or chase it, I didn't have the energy to spare. Especially not right now.

I just watched as the bird flew away with the nice, plump rabbit. After watching it go away I turned back to hunting. I finally found some prey but was highly unsuccessful at catching it. I dove down but I always did so a few seconds too late. What was wrong with me?

If I couldn't hunt then I couldn't…no, I guess I could stop by a McDonald's and get something. Of course then I would have to come up with some money. Though that would be easier than trying to hunt prey that I couldn't catch.

I turned my hunting towards areas that had some fast food places. Maybe I could just steal something through the drive through. While my reflexes seemed to have gone to hell, they couldn't have been that bad as to not be able to outmaneuver a human.

Looking down I saw a car, a fancy one, driving down the road. Suddenly it pulled over and a woman got out of it, yelling at the car. I laughed, not thinking that she could hear me, and suddenly I realized who she was.

Okay, so she hadn't been my favorite character in the series. When you have Mark Ruffalo and Robert Downey Jr. in a series, can you really concentrate on anyone else? Okay, Scarlett Johanson, but that's only because her Black Widow reminds me of Rachel.

Below me was Pepper Potts, a strong woman in her own rights who had saved Tony Stark's ass in the third Iron Man film.

I found a place where I could morph human without her noticing. I morphed as fast as I could so I would have enough time with her as I needed to. I walked to her with my hands raised, trying to appear as innocent as possible, and she looked at me.

Pepper had been a few seconds away from calling someone.


	3. Chapter 3

"So…" I said after I had told Pepper my story.

"It is odd, but you date Tony and…you run into some strange things." She said with a small smile.

I knew she didn't just mean the odd things Tony did, but the fact that he was an Avenger. That wouldn't make dating him the most normal of things. Not that I could talk, my relationship with Rachel was odd to say the least. I was trapped in a hawk's body and only able to be human for two hours at a time.

"Yeah, I heard." I told her.

"You watched the movies?" Pepper asked, still not able to believe what I had told her.

"Yeah, but not as much as the others. I spend most of my time as a hawk so…"

"Doesn't give you much time to binge watch Avengers movies."

"I…hope you're not insulted by that."

"I'm the CEO of a company, I know that sometimes you can't watch some of the popular things out today."

Being a hawk and being a CEO. Whoever knew that there was a connection between the two? Of course Marco would've said something to Pepper's comment but I couldn't think up anything witty to say. Of course, neither could he.

"Well, you can demorph now until Tony comes." Pepper said and turned away as I demorphed.

I understood about her not wanting to watch as I demorphed. Only Estreens like Cassie could make morphing look half-way appealing. Being another animal was awesome, but turning into one was another matter.

I concentrated on my hawk morph and the first thing to happen was my eyesight changing. I sighed in relief as the world quickly became as clear as it should. I then shrank to red-tailed hawk size before other changes started happening.

For a moment I felt a twinge of jealousy about Pepper being able to look away. The morph was going along much…odder than normal. Yeah, usually it was creepy but this time it was super creepy. Feathers were appearing from my skin and hairs turning into feathers. I felt my mouth and my beak was formed but it still was made of human skin.

I closed my eyes and just concentrated on finishing the morph. If I focused on anything else I would be stuck like this. After the morph I opened my eyes and let out a long sigh. I spread my wings and, as was usual, felt more at home in my hawk body than my human one.

Being a hawk most of the time made me realize how weak humans really were. If it weren't for our brains, we would've died out a long time ago.

I jumped up and flapped my wings so that I could land on the top of Pepper's car. I preened myself out of nervousness and Pepper remained quiet. I guess she was saving all her energy to talk to Tony. And talking to Tony…it would probably rank up there with talking to Marco.

_I see him._ I told Pepper and she just nodded.

I watched him driving up towards us, theories that he had to always drive himself due to his parents' death coming to my mind, and had to stop myself from preening. Not because he was cute, but because now things would really start to get complicated.

How would this encounter go? For better or worse? Would he let me in or would he throw me out? I had to remind myself that Pepper didn't mind me and she had a leash on Tony. One of the few people that did.

"Pepper," Tony said when he got out and looked up at me. "He seems to like you."

Of course he wouldn't know that I wasn't an ordinary, or one could argue a real, hawk. Pepper hadn't told him that and I doubt he would guess that on his own.

"This is the boy I was talking to you about," Pepper said, looking at me. "His name is Tobias Fangor and he has a story to tell."

Tony just looked from Pepper to me as if he expected some big joke. He must have really loved Pepper not to have a comeback ready.

_I am Tobias Fangor._ I told him and he took a step back.

Tony stepped back and looked at me. He was shocked, that I could easily tell. His face went through a few different phases as I told him about who I was and how I had arrived here. Luckily he only threw a few jokes at me as I told him about the Yeerks and about how I, along with my friends, were fighting off an alien invasion.

"At least us Avengers were adults and…somewhat prepared." Tony said at one point. "You are…kids. You shouldn't have to fight."

_But we're the only ones who know the truth._ I replied. _It would be wrong not to fight._

When I finished telling my story I was nervous. Besides giving me a safe place to stay, Tony could offer me a way to get back. Without his help…I probably would never get back home. I'd never be able to see Rachel again. I'd have to hope that my friends would win the war and that humanity didn't become just another race of slaves for the Yeerks.

Tony looked at me for a long time and I didn't blame him. It was a lot for someone to take in.

"I'll let you stay." Tony said. "But you won't be going on any missions. S.H.I.E.L.D. has fallen and so the Avengers club is up and running. We go where we're needed. I know you've fought before, I believe you, but I'm not going to watch you die on our account. Not before you can get back home."

_I understand._ I said. _I need to finish hunting before I go to the Avengers Tower._

Tony nodded and I took off.

I thought of how insulted Rachel would be for not being allowed to fight, but I was okay. I didn't need any more mental scars. I would get enough when I returned home.

Focusing on hunting, I hoped I could actually catch something this time.


	4. Chapter 4

I ripped into my rabbit that I had caught and brought back to Avengers Tower. It had been a good catch and I hadn't minded flying it all the way back to the tower. Hunting had become a couple hours of relaxation each day. A couple of hours where I didn't need to worry about getting back home or seeing Rachel.

All I had to worry about while hunting was hunting and not getting attacked by another bird.

"Don't you usually eat that on the roof?" The person at the table asked me.

His voice was slightly disturbed but had much more a feeling of caring in it. His name was Bruce Banner. I was eating breakfast with the Hulk! It was cool to eat with the Avengers. Hell, when I got back home I'd probably bring it up now and again.

Would Rachel be impressed?

_You mean where Tony just happens to have to go all the time?_ I asked Bruce and swallowed some more rabbit.

Bruce smiled softly and nodded. He ate his eggs while shaking his head. Tony was like Marco: good, but only in small doses.

Tony cared about me but he…well, he wasn't the kind of person I'd want to hang around all the time. And, right now, I wanted a morning or two without Tony coming in and joking around. Better I spend my mornings in the company of someone who was completely different.

"You could live somewhere else." Bruce said. "You don't have to live in the tower."

I shook my head. I had to remind myself that not everyone would understand what living like a hawk really meant. It wasn't just looking neat, it was a life and death matter all the time. There could be times when you'd be in competition with another predator and sometimes food could get really scarce.

_Hunting now and again is fine._ I told Bruce. _But living somewhere else would mean claiming a territory and then defending it. I don't expect to be here for too long so I don't want to put in the effort. Better to deal with Tony than dealing with finding a temporary territory._

"That bad?"

_Yeah._

Bruce let out a soft chuckle. It was strange to think that this man could, at any moment, change form to an unstoppable creature fueled on anger. I couldn't see it and when I looked at Bruce I saw myself. There were just…similarities between me being trapped in hawk form and his gamma ray accident.

"But at least he tries." Bruce said. "That's why I help him when I can."

Bruce and Tony had been helping me try to get back home. Both men were scientists and could put their mind to very complicated tasks when they wanted to. I admit that Bruce seemed like the one that was smarter, but Tony proved himself as he was also trying to get me back home.

I could never figure out what the terms they used meant, they spoke too fast, but both had a good vocabulary. They were also able to work out some things that seemed to help whatever they were doing to get me back home.

_I guess,_ I replied. _Just…you seem to have a lot better hold of yourself than him._

Bruce ate and there was an awkward silence for a few minutes. I could see the pain that went over his face. Was he thinking about the Hulk and how that side of him could come out at any time? Was he feeling guilty about something he had done as the Hulk?

"How did you get trapped?" Bruce asked.

_It was an accident, really._ I began.

No, it hadn't been an accident. It had been deliberate. In the confusion that was my first battle in the Yeerk pool, I had found my moment. While I had told the others that I just couldn't find time to escape before two hours, I had left the Yeerk pool shortly after the others had.

There had been so much confusion that none of the others had noticed. So I had flown around to waste time before going to one of my friends to start the lie. I had gone to Jake as I couldn't bear thinking about lying to Rachel then. Her tears would've been enough for me to admit the truth then.

_I went to Jake and told him. I lived in his attic until I grew used to life as a hawk._ I continued. _I tried committing suicide when I made my first kill._

"I understand the suicide part." Bruce said softly. "What I am now is…I couldn't stand it. I tried to kill myself but the Other Guy spit the bullet out."

_If it wasn't for Marco I would've died by crashing into a mall skylight. When I first got trapped, when I finally escaped the Yeerk pool I went to Jake. I…I don't know why I chose to go to him instead of Rachel. But I chose to go to him and he helped me those first few hours. I wouldn't have made it without my friends._

Bruce looked at me and I saw doubt on his face. Or maybe it was confusion. He couldn't know if I was lying or not, he had just met me. He wouldn't know me. Or did…when he looked at me I felt a connection there. We had gone through the same pain, two minds in one body, and we both felt useless compared to our other teammates. We could be great friends if I was staying. We could help each other.

"How long were yo-" Bruce asked and then we turned as one to see Tony walk into the room.

"So that's where you are!" Tony said. "You know, I've been looking for this pigeon everywhere."

I puffed out and held back a stern retort to Tony's comment. He knew I loathed being referred to as a pigeon as those things and crows were some of the worst animals in existence.

Bruce and I sighed.


	5. Chapter 5

The thermals were good in New York today. The noon day sun providing a good amount of heat so that I barely had to flap my wings. Looking around I could almost believe that if I went to California that I would run into my friends.

That I would fly over my meadow and, shortly after, see Ax grazing. I would meet up with him and we'd call a meeting with the others. There would be laughing and just a general sense that all was right with the world.

But I knew that was only a dream.

I knew that if I went to the West Coast, Rachel and the others wouldn't be there. Looking towards the Avengers Tower I checked to see if Bruce had gone up to the balcony yet. He hadn't. I was growing impatient and tried to calm myself by flying around.

Riding the thermals was nice, but now I was growing tired. Red-tailed hawks couldn't ride the thermals like a vulture could. We needed to flap our wings too much. Before, thinking of myself as a hawk would've disturbed me, but now it didn't.

Now I had accepted I was a hawk and was moving on.

I flew over the Avengers Tower and still didn't see Bruce on the balcony. I was flying more out of boredom than anything else and knew that if I landed I would get antsy. I would grow bored even quicker. Hey, I was a teenager.

Deciding that I would grow too tired if I flew any longer, I landed on the balcony. I grasped part of the railing and my hawk mind did what it had to do so that I wouldn't fall off. The animal minds in a morph could be highly useful in controlling the body.

Of course, in my case, practice had made me even better at being a bird than my friends.

After a few minutes I turned my head as I heard someone approaching me. It was Bruce. Why did seeing the man make me so happy? Maybe finding someone who knew what you were dealing with, and an adult at that, did help.

"Tobias," Bruce said nervously. "I don't like this idea."

Bruce was usually nervous and I didn't blame him. He was a pacifist at heart and having a rage monster inside you was hard. Especially if you kept fighting it.

_I'll be safe, I trust you._ I told him, more to calm him than anything else. _Besides, I can always demorph and fly away if need be. You Hulking out won't be the worst problem I've faced._

That was very true. If I died by getting killed by the Hulk it would be much better than watching my friends risk their lives while I was safe. I didn't know anything worse than that. That was a huge reason why I liked having my morphing powers back, so I wouldn't be safer than my friends were.

Bruce smiled weakly.

He looked away from me for a moment and I worried that he would walk away. That he wouldn't allow me to go.

"It's just testing something out, you don't need to be there." He finally replied. "You'll be risking your life for nothing."

Bruce was right and I wondered why I really wanted to go. Was it because I was interested in seeing how I would be taken back home or was it to spend more time with him?

_Tony will be there for back up. _I tried to reason with Bruce.

"Him?" Bruce laughed. "You trust him to stop the Other Guy? You expect him to rescue you from him?"

I wanted to rub my head against Bruce to comfort him, but that would be awkward right now. No matter what we had in common, I didn't think touching him as a hawk would help. I wanted it to. I wanted to perch on his shoulder and rub his face with my head to make him feel better.

But that wouldn't work. Not now.

_I expect him to give me enough of an opening to escape. _I reassured Bruce. _I can save myself just fine._

"You fought in a war." Bruce said softly. "You didn't have a childhood."

_I didn't have much of a life before the war to be honest. I had no mother or father. Hell, my aunt and uncle haven't even noticed I'm gone. They were my family and they didn't care._

Bruce nodded and I felt that my comments weren't doing anything to calm him down.

_If you're worried about controlling the Other Guy, I know what it's like to have another personality inside you. _I said, changing the topic of conversation slightly. _I deal with it everyday. I can control it._

"You're different," Bruce said and seemed embarrassed. "You're...not a monster. Your other guy is a hawk. At least it's something normal. Not like me. When I go...no one can stop me. Friends can die when I lost control."

_I lost control for a few days. I decided to let my other guy take over_. I told him, wanting to show him how alike we were. _If I had never taken control back my friends could've died. When I couldn't morph I thought I was useless, but I still had a purpose. Even if it was watching my friends morph outside of missions._

I shook my head as I remembered when I had watched Marco and Ax morph mice to sneak into a pool party. Marco had blackmailed the Andalite with flea powder. It would've been a clever trick if it hadn't been so stupid.

Marco didn't know that being a mouse meant getting a lot of predators that you didn't want as enemies.

"So you kids broke your own rules." Bruce said and I couldn't tell if he was mad or impressed.

_We're teenagers fighting a war, of course we're going to goof off._ I said.

"Fine," Bruce said with a sigh. "I can't get rid of you. You're like Tony."

I didn't know whether I should take that as a compliment or not.


	6. Chapter 6

When Bruce said that I wouldn't understand what would be happening in the experiment he was more than right. I squinted with my weak human eyes to try and understand the contraption I was currently looking at.

"You're getting too close." Bruce said as gently as he could.

"Um...er...sorry..." I said and backed away.

I hadn't realized how close I was getting. Being human was more than a little odd and that was an embarrassing fact. Rachel would argue that a human was what I was so I should feel normal in the body I was born in. But being a hawk felt way more natural than being a human for me.

"The kid causing you trouble?" Tony asked over the radio.

I squinted towards the sky to try and see him. He was too high for my human eyes to see him.

"Not as much as you do." Bruce replied.

I nodded at Bruce once I realized I wasn't actually grinning. The duo was a good team. Brains and both could actually deal with the other. Why did that make me feel so lonely? Shouldn't I be happy that Bruce had such a good friend? That these people would help me get home so I could get back to the fight?

I shook my head. I had to stay focused. I had to remember Rachel and the others. I had to get back to her. Or did I?

"Everything okay?" Bruce asked as I shook my head again.

"Yeah," I lied. "Just realizing how insane being here is. I have no idea what you're doing. I helped a little setting up I guess."

"You did make things quicker." He replied but I didn't believe him.

Tony and Bruce together could've made things go super fast. I just took up space like always.

"Ready?" I asked Bruce and he nodded.

I looked at the device and wondered how it was supposed to function. It seemed to be like a cryochamber from an old sci-fi movie. I knew that I would go into it and then be transported back to my universe. But I didn't know how it worked.

Hell, I don't think I'd understand how it worked even if Bruce took the time to explain it to me.

Currently there was a pear inside the seat part. There was a smiley face drawn on it courtesy of Tony.

"The best of Stark Industry." Tony had giddily told us earlier.

The remark had made me groan and Bruce had barely resisted rolling his eyes. Now I tried to focus on that smiling pear to help convince me that things would go well. They had to.

I gave Bruce some distance so that I wouldn't be in his way as he worked the contraption. I didn't know if something was going wrong or not. He was very good at controlling his emotions, he had to be, so I just pretended that everything was running as it should.

"Shit." Bruce said under his breath.

"Something wrong?" I asked, trying to remain calm.

He didn't reply which made me worried. I got the image of a red-tailed hawk in my head and prepared myself to morph if need be. I had reassured Tony, Pepper, and Bruce that I could just morph if things went bad. I knew that Cassie could morph quicker than me and she would have no trouble pulling this stunt off. But I wasn't her.

"Everything is fin-" Bruce finally started but couldn't finish as he was electrocuted.

He flew back about five feet and I turned. I knew what was going to happen, but the thought of demorphing left me. I knew I should've been using these precious moments to get away to safety. However, the need to flee had vanished before it had ever really began.

I couldn't explain it, but being so close to Bruce as he transformed seemed intimate to me. I could be in a position that even Tony, with all of his Marco-like ego, wouldn't be in. Each spasm Bruce had while the other guy was let out had an eerie beauty to it.

Cassie turned morphing into an art form, but Bruce had somehow perfected it without even trying. Somehow with making the process painful and feral, it had made it more beautiful.

"To-" Bruce managed to get out before he lost all control over his vocal chords.

It was his voice that snapped me back to reality. What was I thinking? Had I lost all reason? While Bruce was a great man, the other guy was...he was something else. He was like a Taxxon that smelled blood: uncontrollable.

I focused on the red-tailed hawk part of myself and willed the morph to go quicker than normal. It seemed to take too long for my mouth to turn into a beak. My eyesight gradually got better and I started to think that maybe I would get out of this alive.

Maybe I could escape and get back to my friends. Get back to the fight.

"Boy!" A loud voice said and I was too scared to continue morphing.

Suddenly I was flung through the air and crashed to the ground. My arms weren't fully human or hawk, so I yelled out as my bones were broken. I rolled over onto my back and looked up at the lumbering figure coming towards me.

My mind flashed through all the moments that I had lived and all the moments that I would never get to live.

I remembered morphing hawk for the first time and how free I had felt. Nothing had equaled the feeling of flying, the absolute freedom of it. I remembered meeting Elfangor and the great need I had felt to repay the debt.

A tear went down my cheek as I thought about the life Rachel and I could've had. When the war ended I had wanted to propose to her. Tell her how much she had meant to me. But now I would never get that chance.


	7. Chapter 7

There were so many things that I wanted to get done in my lifetime. I wanted to defeat the Yeerks and repay Elfangor's debt. As he had laid dying, he had broken Seerow's Kindness just so that Earth would have a chance to fight back.

A small chance, but a chance nonetheless.

And now I would never be able to repay him. I would die here thinking of how stupid and foolish I had been. Why had I stayed still as Bruce transformed? Why had I not completed demorphing and flown away to safety?

Now my arm-wings were broken and I was in so much pain that I could hardly concentrate. I had to keep reminding myself not to pass out. Kept reminding myself that I had to remain alert in case there was a way out.

But why?

Standing in front of me was the other guy. A body rippling with muscles and only anger seemed to course through its veins. It was standing there, just standing, and I tried to remain as still as possible. Maybe if I didn't move then it wouldn't think I was worth anything.

Maybe it would think that I was dead.

Or not. I was basing my assumptions on how I hunted. What I would do when trying to hunt a mouse or a rabbit. I don't think that I would be lucky enough for this thing's attention to be like a hawk's.

"Ah..." I moaned, trying to stop myself from making too much noise.

From making any noise.

I tried to think of the other guy as Bruce. I looked into its eyes and tried to see the kind man that I knew that I...that I knew wouldn't hurt me. It took some time, at least it seemed so to me, until I saw a hint of Bruce there. A hint of a man scared of hurting me.

"Don't...worry..." I told him and I wondered why I was saying that.

Shouldn't I be begging him not to kill me? Trying to get to his humanity merely so I could live?

Was it really because I was a warrior rather than a child now? I had been in so many hopeless situations that I guess it would only be fitting that I died now. I couldn't really live past the war. It would feel strange just dying of old age.

I did want a life after the war...but dying in battle still seemed very fitting.

"Do...something..." I moaned as I wanted something to happen.

If he was going to kill me, I wanted him to do it now. I didn't want to wait to die. I didn't want a chance to see it coming, I just wanted to get it over with. No more fear. No more pain.

I stared at the other guy and didn't know what expression I was going for. Controlling my facial expression was a strain for me, so I didn't know if I had a scared or defiant face on.

Whatever expression was on my face must have affected the other guy in some way. One moment he was staring back at me and the next he was going away. Probably to destroy something. I was glad that we were so far in the middle of nowhere that it was highly unlikely that Bruce would wake up to a few murders on his hands.

I coughed a few times as I caught my breath. For a few minutes I couldn't move. I kept expecting the other guy to run at me. To kill me.

But the other guy didn't. He didn't come charging at me in a mad fit of rage. Had Bruce got him under control enough to keep him away from me?

But why would Bruce feel that strongly about me. As I gingerly stood up, I realized which way my thoughts were pointing. Then that moment of clarity was gone and I morphed human. Then I took a deep breath.

Morphing human again hadn't repaired all of my injuries. Some were in places that hadn't gotten to changing to hawk, so those bruises were still there. Painful as ever.

I waited a few minutes to catch my breath and focused on demorphing. The first thing that changed this time were my eyes. Maybe I was so scared about the other guy that I just wanted to make sure I saw him coming.

As I shrunk in size, with no other changes, I looked around for the creature. For the man. For the beast.

When I reached the size of a red-tailed hawk my arms started to change to wing shape, but retained their human appearance. I laughed as I thought that I wanted to get away so badly that this was an especially gross morph.

"Wt!" I yelped as my vocal chords were half hawk and half human.

"Anyone ever tell you that looks disgusting?" Tony asked as he flew me high into the air.

Focusing on demorphing, if only to reply to Tony, I quickly finished it. My hawk mind was panicked, more panicked than I was, as it was in confusion over what had picked us up. Deciding if Tony was an enemy or a friend. Plus, hawks didn't like to be restrained from flying.

_Anyone ever tell you you're slow?_ I asked as I finally managed to calm the hawk part of my mind.

"I thought you'd have it under control." Tony replied. "You said you could morph quickly. And then Bruce changed...It would've been suicide to rescue you then."

I know I had messed up. I had messed up big. It wasn't a small mistake, but a rather large one. If I hadn't stopped to stare at the transformation I wouldn't have nearly died. I wouldn't have nearly died in a dimension where I didn't exist.

_I'm sorry._ I said and tried to preen myself. _I don't know what happened._

"You got scared, it happens." Tony said, though he didn't sound like he believed himself.

What did he know about me and Bruce that I didn't know?


	8. Chapter 8

The events of the previous evening had shaken me to my core. I had nearly died far away from home. So far away that I'd have to travel to a different dimension to get back to my friends. To get back to my fight.

I didn't spend much time at Avengers Tower during the following day. I needed time to think. Time to go over the events. I also needed time to not think about anything. To fully escape into the mind of the hawk. The hawk part of me that had no understanding of what had happened.

You could say that the hawk part of me thought that I had been extremely stupid.

But eventually I had to return. I didn't want anyone to panic about me and disturb their important work. I didn't want to cause too many problems while I was here.

So tonight I was sitting on the couch by Bruce as the evening news played. It was interesting to see what was happening on a day by day basis in the Avengers universe. I could tell Rachel all about this when...Rachel. If I ever got back home.

"You've been quiet." Bruce said with a voice tinged slightly with shame.

Bruce was ashamed for what he had nearly done and I was ashamed because of how stupid I had been. If I hadn't waited, if I hadn't paused, then he wouldn't be ashamed. I would be slightly spooked and we could've laughed about it.

Maybe.

_I'm not usually talkative._ I said, a little afraid for this conversation to continue.

"Listen, I'm sor-" Bruce started.

_It...it was my mistake. I could've flown away and been safe. I could've prevented it. _I told him.

"But you were afraid."

I wished I could give Bruce a good answer. An answer that would make him able to look at me. That would relieve him of all his faults.

_You were...different when you changed._ I told him, telling a half truth. _I'm used to morphing and how that looks. You were different when you changed. I guess curiosity nearly killed the hawk._

Bruce looked at me. I felt his eyes seem to blame me of lying. Like he knew that what I was telling him wasn't true. At least, not all of it.

I flexed my talons, feeling them cut into the couch. My feathers ruffled and I started to preen myself.

"Am I really that interesting?" Bruce asked with a small smirk on his face.

_Parts of you are._ I said and was glad I couldn't blush.

Why would I be blushing now?

"Parts of me." Bruce replied and turned his attention back to the tv. "Tobias I..I think you're a good friend. You're a kid and all, but you're good to have around. Great to keep Tony at bay."

_He's not that bad._ I said as I finished preening.

"It feels like I get overloaded. With you, I see myself. I guess it's just easier to talk to you."

As Bruce talked I noticed something strange about his face. It kept moving in strange directions and then the man would take control again. Was he trying to control the Hulk or was it something else?

_I sort of feel that way with Marco. He's a great guy, but sometimes you really just need a break from him._ I finally replied.

"Seems like they could get along great." Bruce said and turned to me.

_No. No. No._ I said, barely containing my laughter. _Just no._

With that, Bruce and I started laughing. It felt great to hear him laughing. To not be in so much pain. It was almost like...like...like I was just a normal boy hanging out with a friend. No aliens and I was in the dimension I had been born in.

There was no war and I wasn't in danger of losing anyone.

"Pepper only districts him for so long." Bruce said with a fake sigh. "Mostly it's him finding new ways to annoy everyone else."

He slowly lifted his hand and touched my back. I stiffened and then relaxed. It took great effort to calm the hawk mind, but I did so. It was easier to keep that part of me calm when Bruce started scratching. It felt like heaven.

It also felt odd. Hawks aren't used to being petted and I had seen what Bruce could become at any moment. Any moment he could lose control, maybe that made this petting even more exciting. The fact that I could die at any moment.

"I'm sorry for what happened." Bruce said and stopped. "I'm the adult. I should know better."

_We all make mistakes._ I said, trying to calm him. _We're only human._

"Are we?"

Were we? Bruce and myself were in the same condition. I didn't consider myself fully human anymore. There was a connection between us that could have no substitute. A good friendship.

_I...does it matter?_ I asked. _I'm half-boy and half-hawk. I don't think I'd fit as either. And I'd be scared if I no longer had the hawk mind beside me._

Bruce just nodded and I waited for him to say he was human and that he was a monster.

"I'm going to bed." Bruce said as he stood up. "More tests tomorrow and more Tony to deal with."

I nodded as he left. The tv still playing in the background. I had stopped listening to the news of this dimension as I had realized something about Bruce and myself.

I was lying to myself when I thought of Bruce as a friend. I thought of him as much more than that. A friend was someone like Ax or Jake, someone I could tell my troubles to and they wouldn't abandon me.

My feelings for Bruce were like my feelings for Rachel. Some deep, unbreakable bond. Of course not as strong as with her, but still extremely similar.

But Bruce was older, far older, and that was wrong. So wrong. And I was dating Rachel and cheating on her was even worse. I shouldn't do this and yet the thought of him as my lover kept persisting.

I was in another dimension and might never get back home. Why should I be stuck to someone that I would never see again? I had to move on, right?

As for Bruce's age...I didn't care. I loved him.


	9. Chapter 9

I couldn't help but squint as I walked through Avengers Tower. Luckily there weren't too many people near where I was now. I was away from the area where workers would usually be. Where was I?

The rooms. Tony had talked about eventually all the Avengers staying here, but for now it was only Tony, Bruce, Pepper, and myself. Which meant this area was extremely quiet unless Tony was more bored than usual.

I wanted to be human now so that entering Bruce's room would be easier. I mean, just getting to the room as a hawk would be near impossible.

Walking to Bruce's room as a human also allowed me to go over my decision. It was a wrong and gross decision, but it felt like the only right decision to me. Yes, I could be friends with Bruce but our friendship called for something more.

Where else would I find myself such a perfect partner? My situation wasn't one you came across every day and to find someone dealing with my problems seemed like a miracle. Almost like the universe had offered me a little relief while my life was going to Hell.

Shakily I knocked on Bruce's door. Part of me couldn't wait to tell him my feelings while the other part was afraid of them.

Did I really want him to say yes?

"Wait." Bruce said and a minute later he opened the door.

When he opened the door I was glad I didn't have my hawk eyes. To see such perfection with human eyes was enough. I felt myself losing control. Maybe being human allowed me to be more attracted to humans?

"Did you want something?" Bruce asked after a moment of silence.

"Oh, er...um...yeah...can I come in?" I replied and Bruce nodded.

I stood a few feet away from his bed and thought about how I'd word the conversation.

"I feel like an outsider." I finally said. "I'm...I don't know what I am. I used to think I was a boy trapped as a hawk but it's all become more complicated than that."

Bruce sat down on his bed and patted the spot beside him, but I shook my head. If I accepted the offer I would lose the last bit of sanity I had. I would kiss Bruce and then both of us would be embarrassed. That was no way to start a relationship.

"Don't you think of your friends as family?" Bruce asked.

I would've made a joke about him trying to play psychiatrist but that would be cruel. He was going above and beyond his limits to help me now.

"I don't know what family is. I didn't exactly have a childhood before the war." I told him. "I guess they're family. I mean, they're all I have to hang onto. I have no one else to turn to."

"I guess I didn't have an easy childhood." Bruce replied. "I was abused by my father. When people like Tony talk about their fathers I just can't understand that."

"I was abused emotionally by my aunt and physically by my uncle. Both didn't give two shits about me."

There was a moment of silence as we shared a similar pain. My own parents had never been there for me. My father had left and my mother had died in a car crash.

"I would've liked to have known my mom." I finally said. "She died in a car crash."

"What about your father?" Bruce asked.

"Him? He left me and my mother. I'm not going to go after someone who left me."

Bruce nodded and I was glad he wasn't blaming me for my feelings. I wished I was in hawk form so that he could scratch behind my head, a touch I would've loved right now but wouldn't make sense as I was in human form.

"At least you're part of your team, unlike me." Bruce replied sadly. "I'm too unpredictable and when I change I can't be controlled. I'm never me when I fight, I'm something else."

"You're not just a monster, Bruce, you're more than that." I said as I avoided looking in his eyes. "You're smart and intelligent. The Avengers need you for that part of you."

"But that could change in a moment."

"Maybe if you accepted the Hulk more you could control it. With the hawk side of me...once I accepted it I became more at peace. More able to live my life. It wasn't like before but at least I wasn't in so much pain."

"But you're still in pain?"

"That's never going to change. I'm too hurt. I'm too broken. But at least I'm able to go days at a time without feeling dead inside."

There was silence as Bruce chuckled and ruffled the hair on my head. His touch was so much more than comforting.

"You're not broken, Tobias." Bruce said kindly.

"Neither are you." I told him.

For a moment I felt drawn to his lips. For a moment there was no thought of Rachel as I thought of letting him touch every inch of me. I wanted him and every part of my body was waiting for me to kiss him, to let him know I wanted him.

But that moment passed and I was embarrassed I had thought those things. So what if I came here to fuck him, that didn't make the thoughts right. Didn't mean I had to do what I originally intended to, I could always change my mind.

"Do you really want to go back?" Bruce said, a sadness in his voice.

"I have to go back." I said, even as I wasn't sure about my choice. "If I don't go , I'll be leaving my friends. I'll be letting them die without doing anything."

"And Rachel."

"Yeah, I can't leave her alone."

Was there jealousy in his voice? Was he jealous of her? Why did that make me happy?

I started to leave his room and then turned to look at him.

"Actually, I don't know." I said, quickly leaving.


	10. Chapter 10

Another day, another set of useless trials. Nothing was working and the thought of me able to go back home was quickly becoming a dream.

I preened myself as Bruce and Tony cleaned up after the latest series of failures. Some of my feathers had been singed which made preening a bit of a hassle. Every now and again I would taste some part of me burnt.

I was only lucky that none of my flesh had been burned. Sure I could morph and demorph, but I preferred being in my bird form. There was something comforting, right feeling, about being a hawk. Looking at Bruce I knew there was a right feeling about being with him.

I had to tell him today how I felt. If I didn't I would be too nervous and shy to do anything about my feelings.

"You doing okay?" Tony asked me.

_Yeah,_ I replied. _Just...felt like I was going to become dinner there._

"Well I have been looking at recipes, I won't lie." Tony chuckled and Bruce glared at him.

I felt warm inside when I saw Bruce's glare. Was that a sign that he loved me? That he didn't like Tony joking about those he had feelings for?

A few hours later I found myself on Bruce's bed in human morph. I had demorphed and morphed a few times as I waited for him. I wanted to be in human morph as...well...I had an activity in mind if things went as I had planned. If he had the feelings for me that I had for him.

I had to remind myself not to fall asleep as I didn't want to become a human nothlit. I wanted to have the ability to fight, to morph, and to fly.

"Tobias," Bruce said in surprise as he opened his door. "Are you okay?"

"Um...yeah..." I said uneasily as I realized that the moment had finally arrived.

What should I say? Where should I start? How to convince him that this wasn't just a crush I was feeling and that I truly wanted him?

I wish I had the courage to go up to him and kiss him. To wrap my arms around him. To become one with him in a moment of pure ecstasy.

"I've lied to everyone about how I got trapped." I said as I slowly built up the courage to tell him that I loved him.

Bruce sat down by me and looked me in the eyes. I think he knew what telling him this meant. This wasn't something I'd tell just anyone and maybe he guessed that what I said hinted at something more. Something beyond friendship that I felt for him.

"When I was down at the Yeerk Pool I could've escaped sooner." I continued.

"No, you're just using what you know now to decide what you'd do back then." Bruce said, his voice full of denial. "You didn't allow yourself to become trapped."

"I know what I did back then because I've thought about it so often. I try to deny it to myself, even, but I did trap myself in morph. I thought that by becoming trapped in morph I'd be free of all my pain, of all my misery. Flying had made me feel so free and I wanted to feel like that all the time. I didn't realize the consequences at the time. All I realized was that I wouldn't have to live with my aunt or uncle. That I wouldn't be beat up everyday at school."

Bruce looked away from me and was silent.

"I had a horrible life, Bruce, I wanted to escape." I tried to explain to him. "I didn't know that the hawk mind would make life so miserable."

"If you had to go back and make that same choice again, would you?" He asked, turning to me.

"Yes." I answered and he was silent. "Now I'm not a boy or a bird. I'm an odd mixture of both. I can't...I can't be without one part of myself and feel complete."

"I wish I could feel the same way about the other guy."

"Maybe one day you will."

"Did you come here to tell me about how you trapped yourself in morph or did you come to tell me something else?"

Was that hope I heard in his voice? Was that the longing of him wanting me to say I had feelings for him?

"Bruce, I..." I said and felt my face blushing. "I've never met anyone like you. I look at you and I see me. I see someone that I could be with for a long time."

"Tobias, you're a boy. I mean even if I..." He said and I swear I started to see him blush.

"I know you're supposed to be the adult, but just tell me if you love me."

In those moments of silence I was scared. I had opened up in a way I didn't normally and was worried that Bruce wouldn't return my feelings. If he didn't I would leave the room in utter embarrassment and despair. For some reason him not being my lover made me feel incomplete.

Another part of me knew my feelings were wrong and wanted Bruce to correct me so that I didn't cross a line. A line that should never be crossed.

Bruce looked at me and then his lips were on mine. A pleasurable feeling ran down my spine as I wrapped my arms around his neck. Taking in his taste, his scent.

"I love you," We said as one when our lips briefly parted.

As he pushed me down, I felt pure bliss. Everything I had wanted was in his touch. And when our love making was over he would be there for me as an emotional anchor. I would do the same for him as he deserved it.

Our passion continued until the morning light entered the room and, only then, did I fall asleep in his arms. Tired from our passion and my endless demorphing I had to do so I didn't get trapped in morph.


	11. Chapter 11

Another day and another set of trials. Each time I couldn't understand what was going on, as both Tony and Bruce used science jargon that I couldn't understand, and each time the tests weren't successful. I constantly had to calm the hawk part of myself so that I didn't try to fly away.

It was becoming harder and harder not to lose control as I was bored and the hawk didn't understand what was going on. I didn't think a human could fully understand what was going on so a hawk had even less of a chance to understand the situation.

Finally there was a break for a few hours and I rushed to take to the skies. I felt guilty for leaving my boyfriend alone so easily, but the inside of a lab was not the place for a hawk. The hawk needed the sky as much as a human needed air.

Soon enough I had caught a thermal and rested, trying not to think but not being able to help myself.

I thought of Rachel and worried that she wouldn't fully grasp my situation. I would always love her and yet I would always love Bruce more. It was a strange feeling, now that Bruce and myself were official, to think of me without Rachel. At least not like we were before.

Even if I did get back to her I don't know if we could be together.

A landscape without a bustling city was now below me and I decided to hunt. I hadn't planned on it but I felt hunger and felt it wouldn't be good to waste this oppurtunity.

I would be back late to Avengers Tower, but I would still be back. I would still be there for even more tests.

Below me I noticed a raccoon and was glad I wasn't hungry enough to go after one as I didn't want the fight. I wanted an easy kill where I could escape fully into my hawk mind. I finally caught sight of prey that I knew would be good to eat and wouldn't be that difficult to catch.

Below me was a nice, plump shrew and my hawk mind zeroed in on it. My mind was narrowed down to just a hawk chasing prey. There were no philosophical questions in my mind as I started to dive down. There were no human doubts in my mind as my talons caught the shrew and we both headed towards the sky, the shrew struggling to get free as it died.

I flew around for a few minutes looking for a tree to perch in so that I could safely eat my meal. There was always the chance that another predator could come after me either because I was in its territory or it liked my meal.

Eating the shrew, my beak ripping its juicy body apart, I thought about how many more tests I could really endure. How many times my hopes could be dashed against the ground. I would, of course, want the tests to continue so that I could get back to fighting off the Yeerk invasion. But I was swiftly losing hope.

X X X

"I think we've tried everything." Bruce said as he, Tony, and myself at dinner. "There can't possibly be another way we haven't tried."

"Listen, that's your problem." Tony said after he finished chewing his food. "You give up too easily. This isn't a problem that's going to go away in a day or two. We really have to work on it."

"And we have been working on it. A lot."

"There's always the chance that we missed something."

Bruce ate for a few minutes in silence and looked at me. I was eating some uncooked chicken, Tony had thought it funny and called me a cannibal when I started eating, and used eating as a distraction. I knew both men and been working hard to get me back home. I also knew there was a chance that all their hard work and effort wouldn't mean anything by the end of the day.

"I'm sure birdbrain here has some hope." Tony said which forced me into the conversation.

_I think you two are brilliant enough to find a way to get me back._ I agreed even as I doubted. _But I agree with Bruce that if you haven't found a way to get me back yet that I might be stuck here._

And being stuck here wouldn't be bad. While I wouldn't have my friends, I would have Bruce. The times when there wasn't testing we had been enjoying each other's company. Either through cuddling or in a more sexual nature. In truth, I thought Bruce's comments about trying everything was his attempt at keeping me here.

For a moment Bruce and I locked eyes and it was like we were talking to each other in a language only we knew. The same longing I had for him was in his eyes. It was a longing that could only end in sadness as I would go back home, even if Bruce gave up on the venture Tony would not.

Both of us would be stuck with the fear of me actually returning home. Both of us would also be stuck with the fear that it would be the best thing for me.

"Okay," Bruce said, trying to be as calm as he could. "We'll go over a few more things and hope for the best."

While Tony never seemed to pick up on cues, or at least didn't care to act polite, he merely nodded at his friend. It was almost like Tony could hear our private conversation. A conversation told by a simple glance.

_I hope you two ignorant pigeons figure out something._ I joked, though my heart wasn't really in it. _I'm starting to think Tony only wants to make some red-tailed hawk bbq._

Tony chuckled at that while Bruce just shook his head while sighing.


End file.
